I am sitting on the couch right now, sun streaming in the windows and an almost eight-week old baby sleeping next to me. It is so lovely to have sun. Our house is particularly designed to maximize the morning sun. From where I am sitting, I can see out about five different windows. I am feeling blessed right now. I was holding Joshua this morning in the rocking chair. He fell asleep while I was listening to the soundtrack from Spring Awakening (reminds me of Hannah) and rocking, while drinking green jasmine tea (yeah, I can drink it again–it tasted terrible to me all throughout my pregnancy, so I didn’t drink any and supposedly green tea is not good for a pregnant woman–blocks folic acid absorption or something like that). As Joshua slept heavily against my body, I realized that he is no burden. He is pure blessing. I am so grateful for Joshua. He has interrupted the hectic pace and passing of my life. He has given me pause to sit here in my living room on my couch in the morning sunlight.
Each child brings different gifts. Hannah has brought Broadway shows into my life. And Irish Dancing. And Celtic Music. And now, all of this knowledge about exchange programs. She’s also helped spur me towards many grand trips to New York City. The strength of a mother/daughter tie provides an amazing and constant love, support, and encouragement. Now I know how it is to love someone so deeply who is halfway around the world. She also keeps me young, at least from a fashion stand point. I cannot wait for Hannah and Joshua to meet. I know that they will love each other so very much. I know that Hannah already loves Joshua deeply. Here is a picture of Joshua planning a trip to Japan.
Ethan has also brought so much into my life. I’ve learned so much more about gymnastics through him. And I’ve renewed my interest in the NBA and can now name the Celtic’s starting lineup (probably much of their bench too). I’ve discovered so much new music through Ethan. He exposed me to the wonderful tunes and artistry of Led Zeppelin and Jimi Hendrix. He has shown me that there are other ways to “do school” than my “get A’s at all expense” approach. He has shown me what it is to be laid back and how much better life can be when you just let go. He delights me when he talks because it is so rare. He is a little like Yoda–when Ethan speaks, you want to listen. It is usually something good. And his dry humor is really something else.
Ethan was holding Josh last night while I cooked his dinner. Josh took that opportunity to have a nice poop, which leaked through onto Ethan’s shirt. Ethan was distressed but patient with me until I could get there and pick up Josh to be changed. He is a good older brother.
For now, Josh brings me sunlit mornings in my own home (as opposed to a cold, windowless office in staid corporate office, USA). And these fabulous toothless smiles. And cute little stylish brown outfits (even if my mom says, “You can’t put a baby in brown!”). And the opportunity to rediscover my body through yoga after a very long pregnancy. And the wonder of watching his father hold him, sway to music, and tear up–making me too realize what an amazing and awesome thing this life is.
Children are a blessing.