So Josh is actually sleeping in this Saturday morning and I woke up at 6:15 a.m. rather than taking advantage of the rare opportunity to sleep past 6:00 a.m. It is only in the quiet house that I can really hear myself think. I see the sun rising through the trees in the backyard. I realize now that it is rising in a far different location on the horizon than it was in December. I see how ancient tribes, living without large buildings surrounding them, could actually mark the time and seasons by the position of the sun both in the sky during the day and it’s placement on the horizon throughout the year. Chris and I have had many gripes about this home (well, really its location), but it has some really great features too. The two best features, in my opinion, are that we can see both the sun rise and set, and the moon rise and set, from the windows in our house. This is something I’ve never experienced before. It is very cool. Chris, Ethan, Josh, and I were all gathered around the table eating dinner a couple of weeks back (we eat late when we wait for Ethan to get home from gymnastics before eating) and a huge harvest moon rose up over our backyard while we ate. It made me feel so connected to the natural world.
The other reason I got out of bed early was because I have a very bad left shoulder. For some reason, it started to ache about two months ago. It has progressively worsened until the point where it hurts all night, every night–even on ibuprofen. I was waiting until my class was over to deal with it (hoping also that it would resolve on its own), but I am going to see the doctor on Monday because the pain has become unbearable. My bed is now my torture chamber–so there isn’t a whole lot of sleeping going on, which I am sure isn’t helping matters. Having done some research on Dr. Google, I’ve determined that I have somehow damaged my rotator cuff–we’ll see if my real doctor agrees. For now, I try to handle Josh only with my right hand. Sometimes I forget and am filled with the most incredible pain (at least a 9 on a 1-10 scale)–I have to set him down wherever we are (fortunately he can sit alone without ever falling over now) and recover. This was happening about once/week a few weeks back but has now escalated to about two incidents/day. I think it is because, the worse my shoulder gets, the smaller the contact or incident that sets it off. Well, it is what is. I think that most pain is some sort of teacher, carries messages to us. I will pay attention to the message (I hope that it isn’t, “you require surgery”).
Well the sun is up now and so is Mr. Beebe (my latest nickname for Josh), so it is time for me to begin chasing him around as he explores. He is a busy, busy boy.