I remember 9/11/01. I remember sitting in the auditorium at the large corporation where I worked, watching the news coverage on the big screen with fellow employees. I remember the eerie empty skies as I walked through the parking lot to my car. I remember black plastic bags placed over empty gas pumps. I remember feeling uncertainty towards the future.
I remember 9/11/09. I remember being sent away from the hospital by my midwife; being told I wasn’t in labor. I remember thinking, good, Joshua (he already had a name) won’t be born on 9/11. I remember eating brunch with Chris at The Good Earth Restaurant and having to lay down in the booth every five minutes to get through my contractions. I remember Chris taking this picture of me after we left the restaurant, just before he insisted on taking me back to the hospital where Josh would be born a few hours later. I remember looking at Josh’s “perfect” little ears that evening. I remember that one “perfect” evening of 9/11; it was our “before.” On 9/12/09 we would learn that Josh could not hear perfectly. I remember feeling uncertainty towards the future.
I remember how love can enter even our most groundless state; how only love is the antidote to fear.